Preview: “Date Everything” – A Dating Sim That Tackles Existential Dread and Sensitive Topics with Grace

Imagine yourself as a single guy, surrounded by all your worldly possessions, yet with no one to enjoy them with. Must be a bit of a bummer, right? There’s no one to catch the latest flick with, raid the fridge for leftovers, give a gentle nudge about the overflowing trash, or snuggle up beside the fire with. Sure, it’s not a bad existence—peaceful even—but it’s missing that certain spark.

Now, picture this: what if you could date everything inside your abode? Your days of loneliness are over as you can now whisper sweet nothings to your bed, charm your fireplace, or attempt a romantic gesture towards your fridge.

Enter “Date Everything,” a game that jumps right into this quirky premise. As a player — and our eligible bachelor — you’re handed a pair of magical sunglasses, the Dateviators. These aren’t your average shades. Put them on, and suddenly every item in your household takes on a mostly-human form. It’s only natural to ponder what comes next, isn’t it?

Forget dating apps! With Dateviators, you don’t even have to step outside to find companionship. From your couch, you can embark on courtships with an impressive 102 different household items and concepts, hate included.

This inventive journey is crafted by SassyChap Games, co-founded by the well-known voice actors Robbie Daymond and Ray Chase. True to their roots, the game features a vibrant cast of lovable household objects, voiced by celebrities who feel right at home. Expect to hear familiar voices like Laura Bailey, Matt Mercer, Felicia Day, and Neil Newbon, alongside Robbie and Ray, as they infuse personality into these unconventional love interests through over 80 hours of dialogue.

At a demo during Team17’s Showcase this past February, we got a sneak peek into some of the personalities you’ll meet once the full game launches in June 2025. Relationships range from deeply committed to those that slowly build based on your actions. Some items will require delicate handling, while others might only make a lasting impression based on how existing bonds unfold. It’s a bit like real life, don’t you think?

Not every object in your house will be interested in romance. Some relationships will blossom into meaningful friendships, while others might even turn into rivalries.

With 102+ potential relationships, SassyChap Games aims to ensure that each encounter feels fresh and engaging, emphasizing variety, replayability, and a few surprises. While the humorous and cozy vibe is at the forefront, the game also delves into some more serious topics. Thankfully, players can choose to receive warnings about potentially triggering content, letting them decide how to engage with each story, which is quite considerate for a game in this genre.

Relationships, as we know, can be a roller coaster. And when you’re navigating the quirks of dating a floorboard, a coat hanger, or even your gaming console, unpredictability is guaranteed. But one thing is certain: Date Everything promises a wacky, laid-back, and replayable experience akin to the charming chaos of titles like Hatoful Boyfriend and Monster Prom. Not bad company to keep, I’d say.

Look out for Date Everything on Nintendo Switch, PlayStation, Xbox, and PC when it hits shelves in June 2025.